After These Messages, We'll Be Right Back
And we're back!
Sorry everybody, I'm a terrible person for not blogging lately. It really sucks because I really want to blog, and I have really really good thoughts throughout the week. And then I forget. A lot. Yup. Ok, enough sobbing about how lazy I am, ON WITH THE BLOG ALREADY!!!
I love the Navs. And the Navs house, hehehe. I think that the Navs (esp. Annika and Lydia, I love you!!) are better at representing Christ-like love to one another than C4Cers are. Let me explain why. C4Cers are paranoid about guy/girl relationships. We are constantly "unintentionally" finding ourselves in segregated groups in converstaions. I actually intentionally make sure that I am talking with guys sometimes because it drives me nuts!!! And there is not much affection shown between girls and guys in C4C. Contrariwise (I just had to use this word!) I find myself kicking (affectionately) hugging and poking both guys and girls at the Navs house. And I haven't met most of them more than twice. So this post is in honour of them. To them! *clink*! I've been discovering how much touch is one of my love languages, and it's relieving to not worry about whether I am supposed to act a certain way or not. You guys rock!
I still love you C4Cers, and if you have any suggestions on how we can start being more like a family and less like a group of classmates let me know.
I've got to run! Zwing!
posted by The White Blackbird @ 1:20 PM
10 Comments:
Wooooh! You updated! I'm very happy. I think I agree with a lot of what you said, too....definitely the guy/girl awkwardness that seems ubiquitous in C4C can be draining sometimes, though I understand why it is that way a lot of the time. Something about how at universities in the States they have a really big problem with weekly meetings being attended by people solely looking to pick up members of the opposite sex, and in the spirit of damage control, a lot of guidelines have almost gone too far in the other direction...does that make sense? For some reason I've done a lot of reading on this...hmmm.
Anyway, hope all is well for you. I'll talk to you when I see you online!!
Huzzah for hugs and the touch love language :D
Huzzah for the word Huzzah :D
Honestly Zoe, ive seen groups with both, highly affectionate and those that.... arent. in the end you get problems... when there isnt affection of the physical variety people can feel distanced unless thats what they prefer... if there is alot of affection some people can be very uncomfortable, especially the girls and it can be more difficult to keep friendships intact. Just comes down to how comfortable the group is with each other i guess.... but if you want i can always make sure u get a hug at C4C :D :P
anyways back to the *sigh* studying.
-Andrew
I agree with Andrew and your friend up there whom I don't know (nice to meet you, if you ever read this!)...there's a fairly thin line here. I almost think that it really comes down to WHO one is; I'd rather not be touched by someone I haven't given 'permission' to. Also, as you should be able to see very clearly, lots of touchiness leads to lots of attraction oftentimes, and mostly of the physical variety, not so much emotional and spiritual (though those exist with us, too). @_@
The NAVS have a lot of people who go through relationship after relationship because they're based more on physical attraction than anything else and so don't stick, while I don't see that trend in C4C. Anyways, my point is while I do enjoy the familial quality the NAVS have, I also really respect C4C's boundaries. Pros and cons, sister, pros and cons. ^_^ And I might also be hasty in my assumptions.
Love you lots!
Hey Zoey,
I know how you feel but like andrew its is a matter or comfort level. I feel that you can still be yourself. Hug from the NE...lol.. I feel that people need to venture out of their comfort social circles and actually talk to everyone, i know I wish I new some people more but it was my fault for not stepping out to talk to them. C4C (Campus Crusade right?) needs to worry less about "potential" or uncomfortable hook ups and worry more on my people and friendship aspect.
No matter where you go, dating within a group of people is going to happen and its a normal thing that God did not say don't date. If you are not interested, all you to do is be honest and tell them in a loving way that you are not looking to date.
In a devotional it talks about this boundary called friendship.
"He who loves a pure heart and whose speech is gracious will have the king for his friend." (Prov 22:11)
The wise are those who know how to make friends. "A friend is the one who comes in when the whole world has gone out." One way I describe friendship is this: "Friendship is the knitting of one soul with another so that both become stronger and better by virtue of their relationship." Another definition of friendship by an ancient philosopher is "a single soul dwelling in two bodies." The word "friendship" is usually applied to non-sexual relationships between people of the same sex, but of course it can be applied equally to people of opposite sexes. It goes without saying, I think, that romantic relationships like courtship and marriage ought to contain and demonstrate the qualities of friendship, and it is sad when married partners live together without also being the closest of friends. One's life partner ought to be one's best friend.
Laura,
Be yourself!!!!
i miss you zoe!
FRANCHESCA...my dear Franshesca! (and yes...I spelt those differently hoping that one of them would be spelt right...because we all know my dear...how awful it would be, having someone mispell your dear name)... so I'm trying to type in the 'accent'...but it's tough..in fact...even talking in the accent is tough these days.... AAAAK! Remember the times when we COULD NOT actually just speak english without throwing in the 'pot pourri of l'accent'!
Now about what you actually posted... hmmm... I don't even think I'd be 'qualified' to make any comment...but I really like what your friend Laura wrote about friendships... wow...you surely surround yourself with wise friends Zoe! You guys are so deep, I'm not sinking fast enough!!!
Pour moi, I like that girls and guys can just be randomly hanging out and hugging and whatnot... and that it doesn't have to be 'awkward'... but I guess that's all a matter of opinion and comfort. Well... from me to you Zoe... BIG HUGE HUG... I mean...I love you, you're an amazing person, you're funny, you're 'mah-velous', and yeah..you're super cool... so people like that...I'm going to HUG!
Can't wait to see you again sometime! Take care sister Zoe! (Hey...you're my sister in Christ...AND you're my sister in the RMP family!!!)
I MISS YOU!!!
I only like hugging and being hugged by guys, and that's the honest truth. I would only dare to have physical contact with a girl if I the relationship was intimate. Otherwise... I feel it's inappropriate for me to do so. Maybe it's an upbringing on how to treat women and respect.
I however, have no respect for men's bodies so there you go.
Have you met Scott and... his wife (I forget her name, it's really unique, and starts with a C) from Navigators?
I love him. We exchange hugs all the time.
Jeff Halverson was a nice man to hug too.
Oddly enough, I've never hugged Steve Cheung. Or Sam. But I've slept with them before so maybe that makes up for it.
Anyhoo...
Scott's wife is Coreen. Just so's ya know. ;)
Hey the friendship comment came from the devotional I had read online. I must give the credit to them and not me....its just about timing and how God uses everything to either help us understand life or how to use it help others
here's the link for the devo.
http://www.crosswalk.com/faith/devotionals/everydaylight/546312
wow, i had never even thought of the whole concept... Do you really think C4C people are like that, cause I don't get that feeling. I actually find all the people in Calgary very much hug freindly.That being said having touch as your love language can be a blessing and a danger (well it can if it is mine, i don't know bouts yous). In any case i like to have palships that don't depend on the physical. I luv hugs tho.
Daniel
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